Body Positivity: Embracing Inclusivity in Boudoir Photography
In a world full of unrealistic beauty standards, inclusivity in boudoir photography has become an important topic.
Many believe boudoir photography should go hand in hand with body positivity. After all, boudoir portraiture is the celebration of your body in different stages of life.
Even more so, it is an opportunity for us to remember our time before surgery or illness, or a chance to see ourselves in a new light through the lens of a photographer.
But what does it mean to be inclusive or body-positive?
Why can the experience of a photo session, particularly boudoir, have a positive impact on our thoughts about our bodies?
In this blog post, I explore the topics of inclusivity and body positivity in boudoir photography and how booking a photoshoot is one of the most empowering first steps to self-acceptance you can take.
Shifting Into a Celebratory Body-Positive Mindset
Have you ever heard or told yourself:
“I need to lose weight before I book a boudoir session”
“I don’t have the right body type to model a boudoir photoshoot”
“I am too thin to be considered sexy”
“My freckles/stretch marks/scars will take away from the experience”
“I don’t like my nose/teeth/neck/etc and others will have a problem with it too”
“I am worried the photographer won’t like ______ about me.”
“Before I am ready to book a boudoir session I need to __________”
“I can’t book a session because of my gender”
“I am not sure I can have a boudoir session as a trans person”
“There is no place for non-binary in boudoir”
All of these thoughts are examples of body-negativity.
At Toastography, we believe that every individual deserves to feel empowered, celebrated, and seen—regardless of their shape, size, or background.
To shift into a celebratory body-positive mindset, you need to look past these fears and shape new thoughts that allow you to see your worth.
But how do you do that?
The first step is to understand that Boudoir photography isn't about meeting a certain beauty standard.
Quite the opposite, actually.
Boudoir is about showcasing your beauty as you are in the here and now. Every scar, curve, stretch mark, and freckle is a part of your story. Boudoir is about highlighting and celebrating all the unique elements that make you, you.
Instead of focusing on the negative thoughts you have around your body, try reframing them to ones of celebration and positivity, instead.
“Because I haven’t been feeling good inside my body lately I deserve an opportunity to be reminded of my beauty, just the way I am”
“My unique qualities make me beautiful and sharing that celebration gives others like me the opportunity to celebrate themselves too. I am a warrior of change”
“When I step out of my fears and give myself a chance to love myself more I make the world a better place. Not just for me, but for everyone”
“It’s okay that I don’t love everything about myself today, But I am ready to challenge that because I know I am capable”
“I matter and how I feel about myself matters. So I am ready for that feeling to be compassion and love”
“If I want society's standards of beauty to change I need to stop believing those bad thoughts about myself and I am ready to prove it”
“I am beautiful as I am, or as I choose to be. Every day I have the right to my feelings and motivations - and I am valid”
“I am a powerful advocate for self-love. When I make moves to show this my own self-love grows stronger and I set an example for others”
“I don’t have to feel good about myself already to be ready to change for the better, I deserve it”
This practice is not necessarily about replacing the initial negative thought — it is natural for all of us to have negative thoughts about our bodies at one point or another. The goal is to acknowledge those thoughts and shift them into a more positive frame.
Some examples include:
“I am too thin to be considered sexy. But that is just a thought and not my reality. My body is beautiful and I am worthy.”
“I need to lose weight before I book a boudoir session. That is a form of self-punishment when I would rather choose self-love and compassion. I am worthy of challenging my negative thoughts and seeing my worth at any size”
Finding an Inclusive Boudoir Photographer That is Right For You
Not all boudoir businesses are the same. Each has a vision of their ideal client and who they are best set up to empower.
This means some photographers may not offer boudoir shoots to men or members of the LGBTQ+ community. While there might be far more options for CIS women, perhaps their values and mission might not align with yours.
Tips To Consider
For less catered-to audiences, it is important to ensure you find a photographer that promotes your specific needs.
It can be helpful to search online and use words such as “LGBTQ+ photographer” or “Boudoir for men” to ensure you find someone who is prepared and experienced in offering a service that empowers you.
If you are plus-sized, you may want to find a photographer with plus-sized people in their portfolio. The same goes for thin people.
Everybody photographs differently, meaning two thin models might need vastly different poses to feel empowered and comfortable during their shoot.
If you like a certain photographer, I recommend asking if they have sample work or experience that matches your specific needs.
This is a normal question to ask and it can be important for anyone seeking an empowering experience with specific concerns.
Even our BIPOC communities want to ensure hair stylists or makeup artists have experience with their skin tones or hair types because every step of the process can make or break your confidence.
Talk About Your Insecurities With Your Photographer
There is power in being honest about our insecurities. And let’s face it, we all have them, regardless of our body type.
Thin individuals often hear things like…
“You are skinny and perfect, you would never get it.”
The thing is, thin people have insecurities, too. If we are going to create a truly inclusive world, we need to understand that everyone has insecurities regardless of their body type. That is why as an inclusive boudoir photographer, I do my best to create a safe space for all my clients to be open about their concerns.
If there is one thing I have learned, it is perfectly normal to have negative thoughts about your body and feel insecure at times. Having insecurities does not mean boudoir photography is not for you.
Booking a photoshoot can be a powerful step on your journey to self-acceptance, and being open with your photographer and allowing them to create a safe space for you to reframe those insecurities can be a beautiful part of the process.
Take The First Step
If you have ever felt hesitant about booking a boudoir photoshoot because of the way you feel about your body or your insecurities, I want you to know that you are not alone.
Every single person I have photographed over my career has had negative thoughts about their body.
The important shift is when you recognize those thoughts and work towards reframing them in your mind.
Don’t wait to celebrate yourself until you feel fully confident in your body.
Instead, use boudoir as an opportunity to tackle those negative self-thoughts and shift your focus to a celebration of your body the way it is now!
Having an inclusive photographer whose mission is to celebrate diversity and self-love through their work helps, too. If this topic resonates with you, I would love to hear from you!
I am committed to capturing the beauty of every individual and I want every experience my clients have with me to be empowering.
When we uplift one another and encourage authenticity and self-love, we make the world a better place for everyone.
If you want to book a photoshoot that celebrates you, send me a message today.
I would love to offer you a free consultation to get to know you better and learn how we can achieve your self-love and body-positive goals together (and of course score some incredible photographs, too).
